Simple steps to managing your emotional state

A big challenge for many people is the management of their emotional state. This can be even harder in challenging situations. How you deal with such challenges will probably depend a lot on your early experiences and influences. How we are raised, whether we’re encouraged or criticised, will impact on our ability to remain calm and positive under pressure. How we respond to situations will depend on our resourcefulness and flexibility. Naturally this ability is important in both personal and professional arenas.

Just as there are no bad dogs, only bad owners, there are no un-resourceful people, just un-resourceful states; this is the NLP view. Every thought we have triggers a physiological response, so refusing to engage in activities or habits that don’t motivate or inspire us, is a great start to changing how you feel and respond. The ability to manage your internal emotional state is something that you can learn. As with many NLP techniques, it is pleasingly straightforward.

Change the images you create

If you create unhelpful images in your head, you will inevitably experience the feelings that accompany those images. Make more positive pictures and guess what, you’ll feel better.

Change the theme tune

If you join listen to negative people or play ‘break-up’ songs on repeat, you’re going to feel down… done deal. Chat to upbeat people and listen to happy tunes and notice the difference in how you feel.

Change your posture

If you sit with your head in your hands or drag your feet as you move, the likelihood is that you’ll feel how you look – miserable. Instead, move with purpose and get a spring in your step and you’ll look and feel more confident and get better responses from others too.

Change your self-talk

If you have experienced a lot of criticism, especially in childhood, you will probably have confidence issues and low self-esteem. The same happens if you are critical or judgemental of yourself. By changing your internal dialogue you can change how you feel about yourself. Managing your self-talk is a crucial part of feeling good and being positive.

If these steps sound too simple to be successful, give them a try or recommend them to friends or clients. It may take a bit of effort for them to become automatic, but repetition will create new ways of thinking, feeling and operating in the world. It only takes 28 days to create a new habit!

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